You were her turning point.

She had promised herself that this was it. She promised herself to say no to all the rubbish ways of flattery, the endless flirtatious moments, the meaningless sex. She had it done it all, so many times, but didn't find it fulfilling. Yes, she had decided to shut her doors. She was a mess, a wreck, trying to figure out who she was and what she wanted.

You came out of nowhere. Took her completly off guard. She wasn't sure if she was ready. The timing was horrible, she felt. She knew she was going to break her promises. How could she possibly say no? You were her dream come true. Simple, full of life, humble, beautiful smile, deep eyes, genuine (at least she thought you were), completely and ridiculously crazy.  She loved it. She loved every bit of it. You were perfection, in her eyes. Yes, she is the type to fall in love too easy. 

Her days with you were limited, but every day, she fell more in love with you. Can you blame her? Love doesn't come with a warning. Love happens.  But what you didn't see was, throughout her days with you, she was silently but constantly in battle with herself, battling her feelings for you. You kept reminding her that this was just one of those summer romances. It wasn’t easy to accept that she had to let go what she loved so very dearly. Imagine battling this much of pain, day in and day out, and still having to pretend everything was ok?

You thought she was “complicated”, but you failed to see her through. You didn’t see that she was just so much in love with you. She was one of the simplest of beings. All she ever wanted in life was to be happy. To love and to be loved. How had you not seen it? Had she done it all wrong? They say you get only one chance in life to make that first impression, to make it all count. 

You were just passing through her life. You told her over and over again, that this wasn’t your stop. But she wanted you to stay. She wanted to be able to have this everyday of her life. She was in love. Madly and endlessly in love.

But you didn't know this, you probably will never know. She was your “time off” from real life, but for her, you were her reality . She didn’t have anywhere else to go when you packed up and left. 

It was too late, way too late. Time was up even before she knew it. You packed your things, and you were gone, gone too soon that you didn’t even kiss her goodbye. You left her. She remained just as you left her. She wasn’t ready to have you go just like that. She wanted a second chance, She still does. If the roles were reversed, She would have stayed. She would have made it work. Tried, the least.

Her nights are filled with unanswered questions, but now you’re just apart of her all the past scars and memories. Tightly bottled-up. You were her turning point. She will never allow herself to love completely. She will always hide some parts of her, she will be mysterious, elusive and sometimes aloof.

You promised her that things will get better. But she was never the type to believe in promises. How could she? She broke her own promises to herself.  She is lost, miserable and hopelessly in love. She is still trying to figure it out. She is work in progress.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRWox-i6aAk

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